26 October 2020

A Hubbin Relationship

Do you ever just gaze at your mate and say in your head, "What would I do without you?" I do and I say out loud at the right time, "Who's the best wife for you?" It's not egotistical to have these thoughts. It is acknowledging that the love of your life is the perfect match to who are before, now and beyond.

Without my husband, who knows if I would even be here now writing to you. My health scare was his first to experience. He had to see me barely attached to my body, mentally. He had the worry if I was going to recover. He took on the burden of my care and of our daughter's wellbeing. And he still has the bad dreams that it might happen again.

In our thirteen years of marriage, we both have seen big difficulties - cancer, unemployment, cross-country moving, and family drama. And thank goodness for all the roller coasters. How would our relationship ever strengthen without them? I think most people would look at bad things happening in their relationships as proof of incompatibility. I think they offer value in opportunities to grow and expand.

Here is proof from my marriage. Several years ago my husband had his cancerous thyroid removed. The doctor gave him a heinous amount of radiation to kill all the free radical cancer cells. It also meant that we were quarantined from each other for three weeks. We couldn't risk exposing our young daughter. Even though we could talk on the phone, not being in the same space as my spouse transformed into torture.

When almost our time apart was spent, late one night my husband came home for an undercover visit. Those ninety minutes felt like days. We talked about topics beyond our daily life concerns, as if we plugged directly into the Universe itself. We raised the floor of our reality with a new platform to expand our relationship from. And it has no end in sight.